History of Personal Loss Essay

It is always non easy to harken that a person died and it is re bothy hard to harmonize if a family member passed extraneous. The foremost shoemakers perish that I fire toy with and that affected me was the finale of my aunty, my fathers sister. I was windlessness 12 long time old at that time when it happened. I was not that airless to her moreover a month before she died, we communicated often and she even asked authorization to my father for me to exceed my summer with her but my father declined. When we had the chance to spend time together years back, she spoiled me with toys and clothes, thus she became my favorite aunt. Her death came as a shock to all of us.She had a motorcycle accident. Upon interview the news, I could not believe my ears. My father and I flew immediately to their can and there I byword her remains. It was horror for me. She was such a anicteric woman and it terrified me seeing her inside the coffin. My heart was crushed when I saw my fa ther cried. It was my first time to see him cry. That was also the first eer funeral service that I attended to. When it was time to send her to her last resting place, we followed her wake by foot and during that long walk almost all the cars that passed us by threw coins at us. My cousins explained that its a way of viewing their sympathy to us.I au hencetically cant block that incur because my cousins and I was so busy picking up the coins and it made me forget my grief. As Goodman (2000) has discussed, it is not unusual that people faced with emergent death experience absent grief and the initial reaction to the news is familiarly disbelief and shock. The most recent death in our family was the death of my aunt Elsa. She had peptic ulcer disease which escalated to carcinoma. We found appear about her unhealthiness about a year ago and the progression of the disease was real rapid and none of us was ready for her rapid deterioration. After she died, I still cant believe that shes gone.Every time I visit her working place, I still expect to hear her voice greet me and ask me what I expect and how Im doing. Its really direful not to hear her voice ever again and not seeing her doing what she does best, taking c are of the patients in the community. As much as possible, I try to avoid going to her one time office because even up to now, I gaint want to be reminded that shes gone forever. Goodman (2000) also pointed out that a grieve person may experience a feeling that the person is still living. Even though, Aunt Elsas death was really painful, the most painful death that I ever had was the death of my little brother.He had a congenital heart disease, specifically tetralogy of fallot. Ever since he came into our exits, I didnt treat him as fragile as he should select been because for me, he is a strong individual and that he can surpass either heart attack he had. Going to the hospital was a normal thing for me, since he was sick most of the time. When he was eight years old, upon arriving from school, I was informed that he was again admitted. I was very effortless about it but when I found out that he was in the intensive care unit that was the first time I felt fear for his health. When I entered the ICU, my heart just died upon seeing my brother.There were so many tubes inserted in his body and the respirator and cardiac monitor was really getting to my nerves. I tried to wake him up but he wont respond. I tried not to cry I tried to be strong for him but the mere act of harangue was very difficult for me. I want to tell him how much I love him but I cant speak. I dont want him to hear my trembling voice and cut into away my emotion. It was very difficult because I know his time is caterpillar track out and I cant even tell him how much I do love him. The day after, I had to go to school but I wanted to stop by the hospital however, I was running late so I decided against it.After school, I went at one time to the hospital, but the ICU nurse said that he died 900 A. M. that day. I couldnt believe my ears and I went home shocked. It was only when I saw him there, lying in the coffin that I believed that he already left. He left without me telling him how much I do love him. He left me. My brothers death made me realize that anybody that I love can leave me without any notice, anytime. Now, I fear of organism left by my parents. They are all that I have and I cant stand a thought of them leaving me for good, forever. Theyre both old and I know their time in our cosmea is almost up.I try to have myself ready for that dreadful day. I think, based on experience, my initial reaction would be disbelief then followed by numbness, which can last for several days. The numbness would then germinate into kindle. I know I will be angry to myself for not being a loving daughter that I should have been and anger because they left me all alone. The stages of grief that are discussed by Smith (2009) a re denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. One lesson that my parents taught me after my brother passed away was life goes on. tribe we care for and love do come and go but we progress to live. We should accept what we have or dont and try to live life the way we should have. I believe that one can neer forget ones loss but he can only get utilize to living without the person. Thus, I know I have resolved my grief when I am already used to have a life empty of my loved ones absence. This topic is so sensitive for me so I think it is allow for me to share my own experiences of grief with a client/ patient if it could give the patient assurance that after the heartache, he still can have a life.ReferencesSmith, M. , Jaffe, E. , & Segal, J. (2009). Coping with Grief and Loss Support for sorrow and bereavement. Retrieved May 11, 2010 from http//helpguide. org/mental/grief_loss. htm Goodman, R. F. , (2000). Coping with grief after a sudden death. Retreived May 11, 2 010 from http//virginiatech. healthandperformancesolutions. net/Tech%20Trauma%20Articles/Articles/Coping%20With%20Grief%20After%20a%20Sudden%20Death. pdf